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Poster: Shug909 Date: Aug 31, 2018 8:11am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Dead & Co.

First off, like many people here, I appreciate and respect your extensive and detailed knowledge about Grateful Dead music that clearly comes from thousands of hour of attentive listening and note-taking, as I have said many times to you on this message board.

I’ve also been on the receiving end of you telling me that what I hear in the music is flat out wrong and I can tell you that that does not feel very good and I certainly don’t consider that to be you treating me with respect.

You say that you are respectful of other people’s differing opinions but I don’t think you really are. Here’s one way of looking at how you behave on this message board:

You start a topic and open up a discussion on it claiming that you are sincerely curious about hearing other people’s differing opinions on that topic, but you state your opinions so aggressively and with declarative statements that it comes across far more as a challenge to debate you. Then some people offer up what you have asked them for and then you criticize them for both the manner in which they state their opinions as well as criticizing and trying to invalidate the content of their opinions. And then when people understandably react negatively to this treatment from you, your response take a turn towards confrontational hostility, name calling and placing blame on others. I don’t see a lot of respect for others opinions in your aggressive confrontational approach. So saying you respectfully agree to disagree isn’t really true when its preceeded by you trying to invalidate people’s opinions.

Calling me too sensitive is just a convenient way for you to avoid taking responsibility for the words you choose and the manner in which you deliver them. It also sends a pretty clear message that being considerate of other human beings’ feelings is a nuisance to you, one you would clearly rather not be burdened with. I don’t know if you really feel this way or not, but it is the message you send, in case that matters to you.

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Poster: jerlouvis Date: Aug 31, 2018 9:45am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Dead & Co.

I would appreciate you putting forth a case where I stated what you were hearing in the music was flat out wrong.If you are going to make such a statement you should back it up.Also feel free to find all these instances where all the name calling and blame placing takes place.Because saying these things with no context is unreasonable.

In this thread alone I disagreed with wig3 and simply said we must like different things.I called him no names nor told him he was wrong.With fenario80 I gave my take on his link where I somewhat disagreed with him.I simply stated my opinion,not aggressively or inconsiderate of his opinion but simply my opinion.I was called an idiot in this thread and did not respond with any name calling.I feel I go out of my to answer anyone who responds to a thread I start and comment on their comment because they took some of their valuable time to interact with me.For the most part I try to be positive in my response.I don't seem to have many problems with people here and have had countless back and forth's with a lot of people.